Starting over in life can be a scary proposition. What scares people most is their doubt in their ability to start over. They doubt that they will succeed and because they doubt. They either don’t try or don’t try very long.
Start your “Do Over” by downloading the 3 Pillars of Creating the Ultimate “Do Over” for free at https://FreeDoOver.com. Also, Matt has a few, rare openings in his success coaching program. Go to https://DoOverCoaching.com to inquire.
Matthew Theriault: Hey, this is Matt, “The Do Over Guy,” and today is a great day for your Do Over and it’s Episode 52.
Announcer: During an era where countless people, businesses, and organizations are feeling the pinch, running out of time, running out of money, losing confidence, feeling as if life is unfair, praying for another chance and unless something is done, life is going to pass them by. Life is going to pass them by.
Fortunately, in the nick of time, there is now a place where the ignored, underestimated and unknown steps to producing results and making life work are revealed. Save your career. Save your business. Save your health. Save your relationships. Save your life. Get from where you are to where you want to be, faster and with greater ease than you ever thought possible. Say, “Hello!” to Your Do Over.
Matt: Welcome to Your Do Over, the place where I show people who want more out of life, people dissatisfied with their current situation. I showed them how to start over and begin a new life setting goals and objectives so they can create wealth and live life to the fullest. You can get your do over started fast with the solid foundation by downloading the Three Pillars of creating the ultimate Do Over and you can get that for free at FreeDoOver.com. It’s a 55-minute mp3 audio program that I made just for you with three specific steps on how to get success as you start over and that’s yours for free at FreeDoOver.com.
Okay. Got a lot of great feedback from last episode. You know, it just came quite unexpectedly. It just seemed like a normal show to me. I mean, I would typically get a half dozen of email or so from every episode and then, you know, in some episodes they literally open up the flood gates.
And last episode was one of those. And so thank you, just thank you for sharing with me how this continues to impact your lives. I mean, after more than 50 shows coming up with fresh ideas for new shows, I mean, it does get a little challenging once in a while.
So just again, thank you for letting me know that you’re getting something out of them. You know, you did after this little hiatus I took recently. The last show, I mean, it could have literally been two to three times longer than it was given all of the different experiences I had during that time period. I mean, experiences that confirm to me that I’m doing the right thing.
I’m making a difference and it’s a pretty amazing feeling since hosting a podcast and being a success coach and writing a book, I mean, was never really in the cards for me.
I mean that’s not what I envisioned myself doing with most of my time. When I think about how just 9 years ago I was flat broke, bagging groceries, seriously depressed thinking I was sentenced to a life of mediocrity at best.
I mean I had thoughts going through my head of I can always move back in with my mom which is not a real empowering fun. I live life to the fullest. I love my mom but, you know, I’m 35 years old at that time. That’s probably not what I envisioned for myself either.
You know, for a while there I really, seriously given up. It was really just in a single moment though. It was in a single moment in an absolute instant where a lady walking through my check out line, opened up her wallet to pay for her groceries, and out fell her ATM receipt. I snuck a glance and saw $256,000 bank balance on that receipt.
That just really resonated with me because it was the exact amount of most cash I ever had in the bank at one time and it had been just a year previous. It wasn’t even that long ago when that bank balance was actually mine.
And I remember it, I mean like it was yesterday. It was just, uh, it felt like another power speaking to me. And so it was such a moving experience. I had to dismiss myself from my check out stand. I asked the boss to take a break. I went out to my car and I rolled up the windows. I put my head on the steering wheel and tears running down my face. I just got to the point where I had it.
I just I was over it. I was done. I decided in that exact moment that I was so much more than what I was demonstrating. I made a decision that I was going to alter my life forever.
I decided I would never settle for less than I could be. I had no idea what that looked like. I really had no idea that that decision would lead me to where I am today, inspiring others to do the same, inspiring others to pick themselves up after they’ve been knocked out.
It’s an awesome feeling so again, thank you for sharing your stories and experiences with me. I mean it makes it all worth it. And during my hiatus, I was able to meet one of you in person.
I love it when that happens. It doesn’t happen very often but it does happen. That person is Ms. Lily Nono. She had invited me via email to be on her news program, the Crown City News here on Pasadena to discuss my book and it was a very refreshing email.
I was actually pretty excited about it. I mean she had shared with me how she was a podcast listeners and she thought discussing my book in the cause around of the book that I’ve created would make a great segment.
So I happily accepted her invitation. I was thinking how awesome it was going to be to get some TV publicity for the book and the cause but you know, when I got there. That’s when the real gift was given to me.
That’s when the real blessing fell upon me. That gift was Lilly sharing with me how this podcast has changed her life. She shared with me that she had left a solid position in advertising, very solid and stable job.
And then just one day, she just decided to go pursue her passion. She decided she didn’t want to do that anymore. She quit. She walked away without having anything else in place.
And she went on to pursue her passion in TV production. And after meeting her and hearing the story, I mean, I was really moved. And then some of her co-workers had come up and talked to me and said, oh so you’re the guy. You’re the guy that told her to go leave her job. I was like, no. I never told her to do that. I don’t know what happened.
But it was kind of funny and it was all in fun and thank God, I mean, she landed on her feet. I mean she took this huge leap of faith and she landed safely and securely on her feet.
That really just blew me away. I was seriously moved. And I was again, I guess I’m just becoming a more and more of an emotional guy as I get older because the tears welled up and all because I was thinking how could an average guy like me who just 9 years ago was bagging groceries, working for peanuts.
How could someone like inspiring someone like Lily to find the confidence within her to go and quit a solid job in a very uncertain economy nonetheless to go pursue her dream of becoming a TV producer.
Then actually do it and succeed. Amazing. Well the answer is simple. And I discussed about that in the last episode so as well. I simply learned to embrace and implement the concept of focused energy.
And obviously Lily did as well. I’ve set a good enough example to inspire others to harness that energy. And most people are just, they’re completely unaware of their potential and what they’re capable of if they were just to focus all of their energy and resources on a single area of their lives.
I mean focus, we talked about this. Folks, it cuts like a laser beam. It can burn through steel if it’s focused enough. And when that type of focus is placed consistently on a single area of your life, you will think differently. You will think more creatively. You will take actions correlate to these newly inspired thoughts.
You develop unique distinctions on how to improve and how to advance your cause. Distinctions that would’ve never been revealed to you while your focus was dispersed.
And the more I travel my world, the more I’m on the road to my Do Over, the more that I witness other travel theirs. The more I notice how few of us ever achieve what we really want out of life because we never direct our focus on it.
I mean most people just kind of dabble in many things and never make a conscious decision to master any one area. You know, if forced to answer the question, what do you want to do with your life. Most people know exactly what they want to do. They have a pretty solid idea on what to do to get it.
But most people simply just fail to do what they know. They know what to do. They just don’t do what they know. And this is what most of my success coaching consists of.
It’s taking what people already know about their dreams, their wants, and their desires. Then adding what’s missing, then put it all together in actionable daily schedule then it’s just a matter of following that schedule, collecting the feedback along the way and then altering the course and making modifications to the approach is necessary until you get there.
I mean I’m working with an individual right now, David. And we’re going through this exact process but David has a really strong general idea of what he wants to do. But he is really lacking in the specific thing that he wants to do.
His energy is focus is a little bit dispersed. He’s lacking focus. And so on our first week together, we’ve been narrowing his focus so I was to create his road map to the destination that he wants.
And I haven’t had to do this for a while to go back so far and start from square one but it’s been a good exercise for me too. I mean coaching him through this process is personally being forced to cover some things that I guess I’ve just kind of taken for granted.
It’s cost me to think back during that period when I was bagging groceries. I didn’t know what I was going to do. I didn’t know what my plan B was, how I was going to re-create the type of lifestyle that I created for myself in the music industry.
I created a great lifestyle for myself. I didn’t have a plan B. I didn’t know what else there was to do. So today if you’re not getting what you want out of life or If you’re not getting as much as you want out of life. Let’s go back to square one together.
Okay? And let’s look at three principles that should be addressed to create lasting change, to create a Do Over that lasts. One that is ideally your last and final Do Over so you never have to say, I need to Do Over again.
Does that make sense? So the one that would last, lasting results. And what I mean is that we’ve all tried some thing new before. Right? Not to mention starting a new life or starting a new career or starting a new relationships or, you know, starting Do Over developing your body or getting back into shape. Whatever it may be.
In the beginning, you typically experience some good and promising results. Right? You’re all jazzed about it. You’re excited. It’s new. But then over time, maybe a short period of time even, the results have a tendency to peek then tart to dissipate.
Ultimately leading to, you know, just disappointment. After a few experiences like this, it creates a subconscious pattern or a sub conscious, I guess, recording in your mind or it just in your being. I mean most develop a fear of taking action because they begin to believe that their results will be temporary.
So let’s make a conscious decision to make the next endeavor that we take on to create lasting results and specifically results that you can build on and that you can get, you can keep advancing your position, advancing your cause, and building onyour dreams and building it bigger and bigger and bigger.
I’m going to go ahead. I’m going to break it down into steps. Everyone likes the step-by-step approach. I hear that all the time so we will do it step by step. And so we’ll just leave nothing to chance. Okay?
So step one, step one, elevate your values. Elevate your values. Creating lasting results when starting something new should begin by you know raising your standards or elevating your values as what I like to call it.
Moving from grocery bagger to real estate investor began by first tears. (laughing) not a requirement though but typically it’s a sign that you’re really ready to take on your life and do something about it so if tears in the beginning for you, look on the bright side, that’s where of the turn around begins as once you hit that point.
But that transition for me began by making a list of every thing in my life that I was no longer willing to accept. I was no longer willing to tolerate. I decided that making excuses, complaining about how unfair life is.
I decided that beating myself up and I decided that living paycheck to paycheck was not a life that I would lead. It’s not a life that would lead me to any sort of fulfillment or happiness. It was not a life that was going to be for me. That didn’t work for me. I was done with it.
I complete that list and I declared that. I declared that, hey, enough is enough. I’m better than this. I’m capable of more. No one is going to rescue me. No one is going to come along and do it for me
I have to do it. If it’s to be, it’ up to me. And I took a stand for my own life. So that’s step one, you’ve got to elevate your values or increase your standards, raise your standards.
There’s got to be a line in the sand. You know, on one side, you have what’ s acceptable for you. On the other, you have what’s not acceptable. One side, this works for me. And this side, this doesn’t work for me. Okay?
You got to make that decision. You got to make that declaration. It just starts with the list; create a list of everything that you’re not willing to accept anymore in your life. Elevate your values.
Step two; you got to monitor your thoughts and beliefs. Monitor your thoughts and beliefs. Now if you’ve raised your standards or if you’ve elevated your values but if you lack the belief that is actually going to work out, it’s probably nor going to work out.
I mean that famous quote, if you think you can or if you think you can’t. You’re right. Pretty much cliché these days but it’s right on the money. Actually unless you harbor the right thoughts and beliefs, it is unlikely that you’ll even try.
How many times have you had a great idea but you didn’t have the belief behind it so you didn’t even try. You dismissed it. Or if you did try, you didn’t try very long, Right?
Your thoughts and beliefs are required for lasting results. You know, I read a quote on FaceBook this morning. Everyone is posting those little inspiring little signs now. And it said something in the lines of it’s impossible for someone to make you happy so don’t let them make you sad.
Something like that. I think that was it but that was the gist. What that really says is you’re in control of your own thoughts. You’re in control of your own emotions. You’re in control of your beliefs.
No one can give them to you. No one can take them from you. You must become the master of your thoughts and you must become the master with absolute intent. Okay?
You want to monitor your thoughts and beliefs and you want to master them. They are yours. No one can give them to you. No one can take them from you. They are yours for the making. So if you know they’re that powerful in your Do Over. You might as well make good ones.
Makes sense? Step three, alter your approach. Okay? Alter your approach. Okay? Alter your approach. You know, obviously if you continue to do what you’ve always done. You’ll always get what you’ve always gotten.
I think I’ve said those countless times on this show, as it is very true. I mean if you want something you don’t currently have, obviously doing more of what you’re doing is likely not going it’s not going to get it for you.
So by first elevating your values and becoming the master of your thoughts and beliefs, the big question is now what? Right? I mean the movie, The Secret, remember the movie, The Secret, the law of attraction? They had the right idea.
But they left you hanging at the end. Didn’t they? I mean the right thoughts alone are not going to get you to where you want to be. So this is where I am with David at the moment.
I mean I have him out searching. I have him out researching for people that have the life he wants. Who out there is doing what you want to do? Who’s out there that has what you want to have?
And I also have him out there seeking out communities and groups or meetings with similar interests. I talked about it all the time. MeetUp.com. I love that website. It’s a great place to go on meet like-minded people.
Your environment is so important and the people that you surround yourself with, even more important. I mean if you need to alter your approach then it just makes to alter to that of a person who has what you once approach.
Makes sense? You got to change it anyway because what you’re doing right now isn’t working so you got to change it into something else. So if you’re going to change it into something else, go identify who is doing what you want, who has what you want, and do what they’re doing.
Maybe it will work. Maybe it won’t but it’s a better. It’s a good start. It’s better than doing what you’re doing right now. Makes sense? You’re going to want to seek out either a role model or a mentor or a coach.
As I’ve always said, pay one if you must. It’s that important. This is your life. Where you squandering on other areas of life that isn’t serving you. Say, it’s that important but it’s that important if you want to create lasting change in your life faster and with less stress.
I do this all the time. I’ve spoken of my real estate mentor or mentors actually. But more recently as I’m inspiring to create a secondary stream of income online which I probably starting to beat the horse onto the ground but I went to find a mentor or coach.
Because there was absolutely nobody in my life that even had a remote interest or connection to Internet business. I mean most people in my life feel like if you’re doing business on the Internet, it’s something, should I say, profane. (laughing)
People, there are a lot of people that still have no idea if there’s a legitimate business being conducted on the Internet. So I went out and sought out Jay and Sterling of InternetBusinessfromAtoZ.com.
And I paid for their course and I paid for their coaching I followed the steps. I followed the course that they recommended or to fit with this exercise. I altered my approach to that of theirs.
I got the results. You see the same actions performed in a certain way will produce the same results. Oh, and don’t stop there. I mean I’ve done this several times too. It’s very possible that you may outgrow your mentor or coach.
In fact, I mean if you’re doing it right. You certainly will. At the very least you’re going to rise to the level of that coach. And then it’s time to find someone new tomorrow.
I mean the person who’s producing results on that next level. You traveled a certain distance; you’ve gotten to a certain point. Now you’re ready to go to the next distance. You want to get to that next point that next level.
And that’s what I did. Now I’m actually going to have him on the next show. I’m going to introduce you to him but let’s sum it up.
To produce lasting results, first, establish what you refuse to tolerate any longer and elevate your values. Second, change your limiting beliefs. You must master your own beliefs and thoughts. And third, alter your approach. Find a role model and mentor or a coach and copy their approach or borrow it and modify it as you see fits.
And keep altering it as you go along or modifying it until you get there. I mean nothing happens until something moves. Taking action on these three steps is how to create lasting results in your Do Over. It’s your launching pad. Okay?
Now you know. All there is to do now is do what you know. All right. That’s it for day. God loves you and so do I. I am Matt Theriault, the Do Over guy. I will see you on the next episode of your Do Over.
Thank you for tuning in Your Do Over where the ignored, underestimated, and unknown steps to producing results and making life work are revealed. Remember, knowledge is potential power. Take action on what you learned today. This is not your learn over. It’s your Do Over. To view the resources, reference in today’s show and to retrieve the complete show transcript. Visit www.TheDoOverGuy.com. Stay connected with Matt “Do Over Guy” Theriault on Twitter at the Do Over Guy and on FaceBook at www.facebook.com/DoOverGuru.